Questions to Ask Before Choosing an Adoption Agency

We know not all adoption agencies are built the same. Finding an agency you can truly trust for ethical, high-quality services has become harder than ever. Not all adoption agencies operate with the same level of ethics, transparency, and care — and families are feeling the difference. In today’s adoption landscape, discerning which agencies truly operate with ethics and excellence requires more wisdom than ever.

I’ve put together this guide to help you identify the most important questions to ask so you can choose an adoption agency with confidence. Practically speaking, you’ll want to schedule calls with each potential agency, take detailed notes, and even create a simple spreadsheet to compare their answers side by side. Look for consistency, transparency, and clarity. Then, after you’ve done your due diligence, take time to pray and seek peace about moving forward.

Adoption Guide: Questions to Ask Adoption Agencies

Confirm Licensing & Accreditation (Non-Negotiable)

Start with the basics:

• Fully licensed in its home state

• In good standing with the state licensing authority

• Authorized to place children across state lines (ICPC experience)

Ask: “In what states are you licensed, and how long have you been licensed?”

Red flag: Vague answers or reliance on “facilitators” instead of licensed professionals.

Ask About Ethics & Birth Parent Support

Strong agencies prioritize ethical practices and informed consent. Look for:

• Independent options counseling for expectant parents

• Clear explanation of parental rights and timelines

• No pressure on birth parents to choose adoption

• Post-placement support for birth families

Ask: “What counseling and support do you provide to expecting parents before and after placement?”

Red flag: Agencies that focus only on adoptive parents or minimize birth parent needs.

Demand Fee Transparency (In Writing)

Reputable agencies provide:

• A clear, itemized fee schedule

• Explanation of what is refundable vs. non-refundable

• Disclosure of typical total cost ranges

• Clear explanation of birth parent expense policies

Ask: “What is the typical total cost, and under what circumstances could costs increase?”

Red flags:

• Guaranteed placements

• “Low-cost” promises without explanation

• Pressure to pay large non-refundable fees upfront

Understand Realistic Timelines (No Guarantees)

The agency should:

• Explain average wait times, not best-case scenarios

• Clarify how matching works (birth parent choice)

• Be upfront about factors that may extend a wait

Ask: “What is your current average wait time, and what factors most often cause delays?”

Red flag: Promises like “You’ll have a baby within a year.”

Assess Communication & Support

Adoption is emotional and unpredictable. A good agency:

• Responds promptly and clearly

• Offers education and preparation

• Provides consistent updates during waiting and matching

• Has a clear point of contact for your case

Ask: “How often will we receive updates, and who will be our main contact?”

Red flag: Long response times during the inquiry phase.

Research Their Reputation

Talk to past clients. Ask for:

• References from recent adoptive families

• Testimonials that describe both positives and challenges

When speaking with others, ask:

• Did costs match expectations?

• Were timelines realistic?

Check:

• State licensing databases

• Better Business Bureau (patterns matter more than one complaint)

• Independent reviews and adoption forums

Tip: Focus on how issues were handled, not whether issues existed.

Bottom Line When Looking for Agencies

Major Red Flags to Avoid

• Guaranteed placements or timelines

• Pressure tactics or fear-based sales

• Lack of written contracts

• Unclear handling of failed/interrupted matches

• Organizations acting as “matchmakers” without clinical or legal oversight

What a Good Adoption Agency Feels

• Honest, not sales-driven

• Clear about risks and realities

• Respectful of all parties

• Organized and well-coordinated

• Willing to say “this may not be the right fit”

But by now you're realizing how long this might take. Finding agencies that do more than a few adoptions a year, and then calling them one by one to ask all of these questions and verify their responses.

Adoption already requires emotional energy — it shouldn’t require endless hours researching which agencies can be trusted. That’s where Christian Adoption Consultants comes in. We fully vet agencies, ask these detailed questions, and evaluate ethics, transparency, and practices upfront. CAC carefully screens, interviews, and evaluates agencies before recommending them to families. We ask the difficult questions about ethics, transparency, financial practices, and support — because your peace of mind and your child’s future are too important to risk. In a multi-agency approach, trust matters — and we make sure it’s well placed. In a multi-agency approach, you gain broader reach — without sacrificing time or peace of mind. We’ve done the homework, so you can focus on building your family.

You don’t just need more options — you need the right ones. At the end of the day, families shouldn’t have to become investigators to feel confident in their adoption journey. Adoption is too important to leave to guesswork. CAC thoroughly vets each agency, evaluates their practices, and asks the hard questions — so you don’t have to navigate the journey alone. 

Adoption decisions carry weight — and you deserve guidance you can trust. If you’re ready to explore a vetted, time-saving multi-agency approach, feel free to reach out. I would be honored to walk this journey with your family!

Adoption Costs and How Using a Consultant Can Help

How much does it cost to adopt?

Why is it so expensive?

How do families afford adoption?

These three questions are some of the most common I'm asked as an adoption consultant. And really, the underlying, real question behind all of it: How can we ever step into adoption if it costs so much? So many families feel called to build their family through adoption, but too often the costs are the biggest barrier.

At Christian Adoption Consultants, transparency and support are at the heart of everything we do. This guide walks you through the full range of adoption costs, including agency, legal, and travel expenses, and helps you explore grants, loans, and federal adoption tax credits that can help make adoption more affordable.

Typical Fees for Adoption in 2026

Currently, the average costs for domestic infant adoption in the U.S. are anywhere from $30,000 to $70,000. Typically, agencies able to complete an adoption between $30,000-$45,000 are small, non-profit agencies whose fees are subsidized by donors. However, for agencies doing many of the adoptions in the U.S., costs begin at $45,000.

Where do the fees go?

There are many legitimate costs to adoption to ensure that the adoptive family, birth family, and the child are getting quality care throughout the process. Here's a breakdown of where the money goes: 

Agency Fees

This includes administration fees, reports that are required (home studies and post placement visits) and marketing and networking costs. 

Birthparent Care

This is comprised of vital counseling for the expecting/birth parents (both before and after birth), possible living expenses, transportation, maternity clothing, utilities, etc. A good agency will always access community services that are available before asking the adoptive parents to assist with these fees.   

Medical Expenses 

If a birth mother is not fully covered by insurance for prenatal care and labor and delivery, these fees are a part of the adoption process to ensure both the birth mother and baby have proper healthcare. 

Legal Fees

Legal expenses include hiring an attorney for the adoptive parents and often the birth parents to ensure the adoption is handled legally and ethically for all parties involved. It also accounts for court filing costs and representation.  

Why is there such a significant range of fees?

There are several factors that contribute to the range of costs for each individual adoption. Some of these include:

• Geography and the cost of living 
• Specific needs of the expecting/birth family 
• Legal services required
• If the adoption is in-state or interstate 

While it's helpful to see how all of these fees add up, the critical question for hopeful adoptive families is still how to make adopting possible with these expenses. It's rare that families begin their adoption journey with tens of thousands in the bank waiting to be spent on adoption.

How can you make adoption affordable?

Families need to know there are options available to significantly lower the cost of adoption. Here are a few:

Adoption Tax Credit

For 2025, the maximum federal adoption tax credit is $17,280 per eligible child, with up to $5,000 of that amount being refundable. This credit helps cover qualified adoption expenses (fees, court costs, travel) for domestic adoption.

Employer Benefits

Many employers offer adoption benefits such as financial reimbursement, paid adoption leave, or access to employee assistance programs to significantly reduce out-of-pocket expenses.

Grants

There are many grant organizations established to assist families with the cost of adoption. Adoption grants are financial awards given to adoptive families to help cover adoption-related expenses, and they do not need to be repaid. They are typically offered by nonprofit or faith-based organizations and may be based on factors such as financial need, family circumstances, or commitment to adoption.

Loans

Adoption loans are designed specifically for adoptive families and often offer low interest rates and flexible repayment terms. These loans can help families move forward while waiting for grants, tax credits, or reimbursements.

Creative Fundrasing

Many families raise funds through online crowdfunding, community events, and other creative and meaningful ways to share their story. Employer matching gifts, church support, and family-led campaigns can also make a meaningful impact.

Avoid Unnecessary Costs

There are pitfalls in bad agencies, unethical attorneys, risky situations, and unnecessary bills due to ignorance. Families who walk into adoption "blind" with no one to help them through the process often end up losing thousands of dollars this way. You can see that it's critical to find agencies and attorneys that provide ethical and excellent services to both the birth family and the adoptive family. To know that your adoption finances are well stewarded is of the utmost importance.

Affording adoption is not impossible. I've never had a family match with a situation and not have the money available. But that's not to say they didn't do the hard work of saving, fundraising, and financing for their adoption. And when you get down to it, is there any better investment you can make financially than investing in a child?

This is why I love what I do. As an adoption consultant, I help people through the complex task of finding quality agencies, ethical attorneys, and situations that are a good fit for their family. I also connect people to helpful grants and coach them on financing and fundraising. Christian Adoption Consultants has walked with thousands of families through the process of adoption.

The path to adoption isn't an easy one, and there are significant and very real costs both financially and emotionally. But ask any adoptive family if it was worth it for their son or daughter.  I'll bet they'll tell you they would have paid ten times more if they had to, now that they're on the other side and see the infinite value of their child.

Adoption is worth the cost.

Ready to learn how Christian Adoption Consultants can support you on your journey?

Contact me for a free info packet and consultation at susan@christianadoptionconsultants.com. I would love to chat about your hopes and dreams to build your family and help make it happen!

Adoption Story: Marc + Christy

"God won't let you miss your baby."

It's a truth I've seen over and over and remind families of often. When families are faithful to put their "yes" on the table, it's incredible how God aligns so many details. Marc and Christy's story of how they grew their family through adoption is one of trusting in God's plans, walking by faith, and watching God's faithfulness on full display. It was a joy to watch them celebrate their first of many Mother's and Father's Days in awe of God's goodness. 

In 2024, we decided to trust God and applied to an adoption agency that we read about twice over a four-year period in a daily devotional. The agency graciously rejected our application because we weren’t local and they were already at capacity. However, they recommended Christian Adoption Consultants. After praying and gathering ourselves, we applied to CAC and were connected with Susan VanSyckle, who was absolutely phenomenal and perfect for our family. She was so sweet, encouraging, informative, and prayed for us! Susan quickly reached out and talked us through the process and answered all our questions.  She was so kind and thorough and was so encouraging with all of our questions.  We knew that God is faithful, but this was going to be a front row seat to see Him be faithful in growing our family through adoption. Through our adoption process, God taught us to trust in Him and His amazing faithfulness, patience, how to hear His voice more clearly, and how to persevere in our prayers!

Because the Lord was the one to nudge us to adoption, we knew he was going to be faithful; we just had NO idea how perfect his plan and timing would be. We made the decision to sign on with Christian Adoption Consultants. Susan was amazing in helping us gather the information we needed to get everything together and eventually start applying to agencies. To say there is a lot of paperwork in this process would be an understatement. We felt bogged down at times with all the paperwork we needed to fill out, but the Lord continued to nudge us forward at exactly the right time. For everything, we were continuing to trust in him and practice patience as things were not happening in our timing, but His timing each step of the way.  We were filling out paperwork for our first agency and had some questions and concerns about substance exposure.  We reached out to Susan, and she was able to talk us through some of our concerns and then so gently say, “God is not going to let you miss your baby.” Wow, that made us stop in our tracks. You know in your mind that God is in control, but to take a step back and trust Him in something so big and personal, now that is a step of faith.  We heard this truth loud and clear and checked the boxes we felt led to check and gave the rest to the Lord.  

Once we became active with several agencies and started seeing situations, we would pray about each and ask God if we should present or not, reminding ourselves over and over that God was in control of our family.  He was not going to allow us to miss what He had for us.  Hearing ‘not yet’ each time was not easy, but we kept hearing what Susan said to us “God is not going to allow you to miss your baby” and we kept reminding ourselves of the verse “For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord” (Jeremiah 29:11). We knew we just needed to be faithful to the God who is so faithful and follow His voice and leading. 

One day, we received a situation, but we could not open it on any device. We prayed about it and talked it out, and felt this was the Lord protecting us from something.  Two days later, we were contacted by one of our agencies, sharing that an amazing birth mom had chosen us and asked if we were able to accept this match. God is so good, because we were thrilled and honored to be able to accept the match, as we had not been able to open or present to the last situation we saw a couple of days prior. God orchestrated EVERYTHING more perfectly than we could have ever planned on our own. We were matched on the Friday of Mother’s Day weekend, and we signed placement papers on the Saturday of Father’s Day weekend. You know God can do the impossible and is faithful down to the last detail when you read stories in the Bible, but we were awestruck to see how faithful down to the last detail he was through our adoption journey.  From the paperwork, to presenting to situations, to the timing of being matched, to the travel, to our son’s amazing and sweet birth mom, to the love and support of our family and friends, and all the people we met along the way, God was in every detail and we could not feel more blessed to have gone through this process.  To those of you thinking about adoption, just starting your journey, or in the wait, know that God is with you and writing a perfect story for your family, so don’t be afraid to lean into Him in every step. He is writing a story that will draw you closer to Him along the way and touch others as you share your testimony.

Guarding Your Child's Adoption Story

Here’s a question most families DON’T know to ask at the beginning of their adoption journey: 

How do we protect our child’s story?

It’s one that is rarely asked in the beginning because so much of adoption at the front end of things is about the adoptive parents: how should we go about adopting? How do we find an ethical agency? How can we afford adoption?

But a question ALL adoptive families should be asking, even before adopting, is how to protect their future child’s adoption story.

Here’s why: people are naturally curious about adoption, about the process, and about the people involved. And we want friends and family to be on the journey with us: with their support and prayers. But our role as parents is to protect our child’s story from the very beginning. Because really, this is their story, even more than it's ours.

So how do we balance inviting people into the story while also protecting the children involved?

Ultimately, we are careful about sensitive information regarding the child, their birth family, and many of the specifics. We want to protect sensitive information that includes things like why an adoption plan was made, the specifics surrounding their conception, and if there’s a history of any mental health or substance use. There’s a difference between being secretive and protecting privacy.

Two helpful questions to ask before sharing ANY information:

    Is this something I might regret sharing later?

    Does this respect my child’s privacy and the privacy of their birth family?

It’s important to remember that once information is shared, it can never be taken back. And we don’t want others in our child’s life to know more of their story than they do.

So how can you gracefully respond when people ask questions you can’t answer? We could say something like We want him to be the first to hear about his/her adoption story, and so we have chosen not to share personal details of their story with others. Or that's her story, so I want to respect her privacy by not sharing those details. Thanks for understanding.

If you’re currently at the beginning of your adoption journey, it might help to give friends and family a heads up about how you plan to protect these details, so they know why you’re sharing generalizations. This can actually head off a lot of awkward conversations right from the beginning.

Parents have a vital role in their children’s lives to be staunch gatekeepers of their story: to keep it safe and protected until the child decides who they want to share their story with, in their own way and in their own timing.

Because ultimately, it's a child’s story to tell.

Adoption Story: Tyler + Molly

"We are full of hope and are excited for what the future holds. We know God’s timing is perfect and we are leaning into that as hard as we can and doing our best to be patient as we continue through this season of waiting."

That was from an email Tyler and Molly sent me in August. None of us knew then that there was a baby already born who would be their daughter. Just weeks after their declaration of hope and trust in God's goodness, they welcomed a little girl into their home. Today Tyler and Molly share their adoption story.

Through our adoption journey, God has taught us patience, faith, and perseverance, which is no surprise. As any of you who have started down the adoption path have discovered, it is challenging, difficult, and a lot of work! Being on the other side now, though, we can tell you that it is so worth it. It is beyond what we could have even imagined. God's timing is always perfect, even when we cannot see it or feel it in the struggle of the process. About a year into our adoption journey, we thought we were finally reaching a happy conclusion to our story. Ultimately, we ended up going through a sudden and completely surprising failed adoption. We were at one of the lowest points of our lives in the aftermath, wondering what was next: do we even want to continue with this, and would having a child ever become a reality for us? Little did we know, while we were in those dark days, there was a baby being born that would ultimately be coming home with us a couple of months later. Of course, God knew all of this; He was perfectly orchestrating our story and could see to the other side. While we were in the lowest valley, we never lost hope in Him. Now that we have seen the rest of the story and the happy ending for our family, it is amazing to look back and see how God was refining and preparing us. God doesn't plan for bad things, but allows them to happen. He then creates beauty from those trials and hardships we face. We just want to encourage all of you who are in the middle of the storm, feeling trapped, or like there is no end in sight. Keep your faith and eyes on the Lord. Keep loving each other well, praying, and do not give up. Jeremiah 29:11 offered us so much encouragement: "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." 

We also want to send a huge shoutout and thank you to Susan, our consultant at Christian Adoption Consultants. It is hard to put into words how much help Susan and the entire CAC team were for us in this adoption journey. From creating our profile, finding a reliable home study provider, to selecting and getting us on the lists of the various adoption agencies, it was a wonderful experience. There is no doubt, we could not have done it without them. The process has an extremely high workload at times, and our stress level was reduced by a large amount, having Susan and the whole CAC team there to guide us along step by step. The Adoptive Parent Guide was another great resource for us to be able to go look at on our own. When we did reach out to Susan, her communication and response time were so incredible. She was always thoughtful, understanding, very caring, and willing to do anything she could to help us out. If you are considering adoption and looking at going the consulting route (which we highly recommend!) then you cannot do any better than Susan and her entire team at CAC. 

Want to start your own adoption journey and story of hope, contact me here!

Adoption Story: Nate + Erin

I haven't met a hopeful adoptive family yet that assumes the road to adoption will be an easy one. But often, families have a hard time knowing just how their personal story to grow their family will be written. Nate and Erin had no idea what God had for them in the years they pursued adoption, but there's no doubt His plan was good from the start. Read more as Erin shares their incredible story!

Since childhood, we both knew adoption would one day be part of our story. Growing up with adopted relatives gave us a firsthand understanding of the beauty, significance, and lifelong impact of adoption. It opened our hearts early on to the idea that family is built not just by biology, but by love, commitment, and calling. Early in our relationship, we found that we shared this desire, talking often about how adoption would someday be part of how we grew our family. It wasn’t just a passing thought; it was something the Lord had planted deep within both of us.

After welcoming our two wonderful boys and settling into life as a family of four, we began to sense the Lord stirring our hearts again, reminding us of that long-held dream. The desire didn’t fade; it grew stronger. We felt Him gently nudging us, opening the door, and calling us to step out in faith. It wasn’t a decision made lightly, but one covered in prayer, conversation, and trust.

Adoption has always been more than just an option to us—it’s a reflection of the Gospel, of being chosen and deeply loved. We believe in the sacredness of this calling and the honor of being part of a child’s story in this way. So, when the time came, we stepped forward with open hands and hopeful hearts, ready to walk the road God had prepared for us.

We first heard about adoption consultants from a friend and were immediately intrigued. In 2022, we connected with Christian Adoption Consultants and had an introductory call with Susan. From the very beginning, we knew she was the perfect fit for us. Susan made what could have been an overwhelming process feel manageable and filled with hope. She was incredibly knowledgeable, always patient with our questions, and consistently available to offer guidance. Her steady encouragement, thoughtful prayers, and genuine care gave us so much peace and confidence every step of the way. We truly can’t imagine walking this journey without her, and we’re endlessly grateful for the heart, wisdom, and support she poured into our adoption story.

Our adoption journey was long and difficult, marked by years of waiting, failed adoptions, and even a fraud case. At times, we questioned if we should keep going, but each time we cried out, the Lord reminded us to trust Him and His timing. Though it wasn’t easy and we wondered if it would ever happen for us, we held onto faith, believing He was always at work even when we couldn't see it. We clung to the truth that He had called us to this and would bring it to pass. A quote Susan shared with us by Elisabeth Elliot stood out to us along our journey: “Don’t dig up in doubt what you planted in faith.” Despite fear and uncertainty, we chose to keep trusting the Lord every step of the way.

When we presented to our now daughter’s birth mom, we felt a deep peace and were sure she was meant to be ours. When she chose us, that peace only grew. But after arriving and waiting to go to the hospital, we were told we wouldn’t be adopting the baby. We were heartbroken and confused, doubting what we had heard from the Lord. The drive home was painful, and we paused our adoption to heal and pray. One of us felt God saying no new situations would come, while the other felt we were close and just needed to trust His timing. Though it seemed conflicting, we chose to move forward and trust God’s direction. Then, just a week after making that decision—and a month after returning home—we got a call: our case worker told us that the birth mom asked if we were still willing to adopt her daughter. We were stunned. What we thought was a closed door, God reopened. We said yes, and days later, we were on a plane to meet her.

Meeting our daughter for the first time was absolutely surreal—an unforgettable moment where time seemed to stand still. We instantly fell in love. She was perfect in every way—tiny, beautiful, and full of life—a little ray of sunshine that lit up our world. Holding her in our arms for the first time brought tears of joy and overwhelming gratitude. In that sacred moment, every hardship, every unanswered question, every year of waiting melted away. It all made sense.

The Lord had been so faithful, gently and purposefully weaving together each part of our story to lead us to her. She is more than we ever dreamed of—full of joy, wonder, and a sweetness that fills our home with light. Watching her grow, hearing her laugh, and simply being near her is one of life’s greatest privileges. We are constantly in awe of the gift she is to us. Our hearts are overflowing with thankfulness to the Lord for choosing us to be her parents. She is a daily reminder of His goodness, His perfect timing, and His ability to turn waiting into beauty. She’s not just the perfect addition to our family—she is a miracle, a blessing, and a treasure beyond words.

Our daughter comes from a strong, brave woman who made one of the most selfless and loving decisions a mother can make. She entrusted us with the incredible gift of raising her daughter, and we are deeply grateful she chose us to be her forever family. Her courage, love, and strength are forever woven into our daughter’s story, and we will always honor that. She will always have a special place in our hearts and in our home—she is part of our family. We cherish her, not only for the choice she made but for the beautiful person she is. Her love gave our daughter life, and her decision gave us the greatest blessing we could ever receive. We are committed to making sure our daughter grows up knowing how deeply she is loved by her birth mom and how her story began with immense bravery and love.

The journey to our daughter was nothing like we expected, but we wouldn’t change a thing. The Lord orchestrated it so beautifully—far beyond what we could have imagined—growing us individually, strengthening our marriage, and deepening our faith as a family. Adoption isn’t easy; it’s filled with unknowns, waiting, and moments of surrender. But through every high and low, we’ve seen how God’s love and grace sustain and shape us. He used this journey to refine our hearts, to teach us trust on a deeper level, and to remind us that His plans are always good—even when they look different from our own.

Adoption has forever changed us. It has expanded our understanding of love, of sacrifice, and of what it means to be family. It’s taught us to hold space for both joy and grief, and to embrace the beauty of redemption woven through brokenness.

God continues to write the story of our lives with care and purpose, and we know that our precious daughter is one of the most beautiful chapters—a gift beyond anything we could have hoped for. She is a living reminder of His faithfulness, and we are honored to be her parents.

I love that Nate and Erin wanted to end their story with verses they clung to during their adoption journey and prayers that they would encourage others.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.  -Proverbs 3:5-6

Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice. Let your reasonableness be known to everyone. The Lord is at hand; do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”   -Philippians 4:4-7

The plans of the heart belong to man, but the answer of the tongue is from the Lord.  -Proverbs16:1

Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer.  -Romans 12:12

Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.  -1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

But they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.  -Isaiah 40:31

Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the Lord!  -Psalm 27:14

Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him, and he will act.  -Psalm 37:4-5