When it comes to adoption, a lot of people talk about "perfect timing." The idea of waiting on God's timing and having the faith to trust in His sovereignty. But reading about waiting on God is so much different than experiencing it personally. Today Becca shares their story and how it felt to wait on God's timing bringing this sweet boy into their family.
Trust in God’s timing – always. This seems like a simple concept when you see it in writing, but the complexity that comes from putting this faith into action can at times feel like you’re fighting an uphill battle against yourself. As Christians, we rely on this statement as a foundation of our faith, but what happens when God’s timing is so drastically different from our own expectations? How do we continue to trust in his timeline when our imperfect and broken human hearts and emotions saturate our brains with questions and doubts?
As we went through the adoption process, Cody and I wrestled with these questions and doubts, but it
was also through this process that we witnessed such a beautiful display of God’s providence and perfect timing in our lives. Adoption is a story of love, but it’s also a story of God’s carefully crafted timing.
In our story, the concept of timing started long before the word adoption was ever a part of our daily vocabulary. A few years ago, we decided that it was the right time for us to start a family. And while the timing seemed right to us, what started out as God saying no month after month turned into him saying no year after year. In hopes of growing our family, we naturally questioned what to do next. It was at this point that we both realized that God had placed the idea of adoption on both of our hearts as the means to starting our family.
In August 2018 we signed up with Christian Adoption Consultants. Susan was our consultant and was a constant source of support and guidance along the way. As we worked through the process and the seemingly endless paperwork, we felt so at peace that we were on the path God had intended for us to start our family.
By the end of December, we were officially an active waiting family and had applied to several agencies. The anxiousness set in as we waited to hear if we were matched. While we knew an adoption could take well over a year, feelings of impatience started to creep into our lives rather quickly. After wanting to start a family for years, we honestly didn’t want to wait any longer. As we battled these emotions, we continued to trust in God’s timing and plan for our lives.
As we approached the end of February, we received the phone call that we had been praying for. It was our agency in Louisiana calling to inform us that we had been matched with an expectant mother who was due with a baby girl the following week. We were speechless as we sat on the phone with the agency, tears welling up in our eyes. We then learned that this mother had requested to have a phone call with us since there wouldn’t be time to meet before her due date. Over the next few days, we excitedly told family and friends our news and waited for that call, but it was the call that never came.
Just when we thought all the pieces of our story were falling into place, God was instead telling us to hold on a little while longer. And while we grieved over that call that never came, it wasn’t long before we found out why. About a week later we received another call – the call that our hearts had been waiting for. It was the call that told us we had been matched with an expectant family who would entrust us with their little baby boy as our son.
When we first received the call about our son Bryce, our hearts and emotions were much more guarded. We had already seen how quickly a situation can change, so while we were excited by this news, the reality of it hadn’t hit us yet. Our emotions were still raw from the week prior, but as we processed through everything over the next several days, it all began to sink in, and our anticipation began to grow as we quickly prepared to make the trip to Louisiana.
We had received the call from our agency late on a Friday afternoon and were told that Bryce’s birth mother was expected to deliver by c-section the following Wednesday. The few days in between were quite a whirlwind as we got ready for our trip. Wednesday came, and we woke up at 3 AM in the morning to start the 9-hour drive. While Cody remained relatively calm on the drive down, I could not contain my nerves. All the questions and uncertainty were spinning through my head, and it truly felt like the longest drive I had ever been on. We were aware that one of Bryce’s ultrasounds had showed a possible brain defect that the doctors would not be able to diagnose until after birth when they were able to run a better scan. We were obviously anxious to get those results, but I think what we were most worried about was the uncertainty of the adoption falling through again. We could not imagine making the trip home without a baby.
We were well into our drive when we received word from our agency that Bryce had been born. They sent us our first picture of him and gave us a positive report on his health issues. That moment as our tears started to flow will forever be etched into our memories. When we arrived at the hospital, it was a few hours before we were able to go back and see him. While the brain defect on the ultrasound appeared to have been a fluke, he did end up in the NICU for other unrelated medical issues. It was late afternoon when we were finally able to meet our son. It was such a surreal experience as we stared in amazement at the precious little boy God had brought into our lives.
Our agency made arrangements the following day for us to meet with Bryce’s birth parents. Talk about nerves! It wasn’t long after meeting them though that we felt at ease. We formed such a bond with them as they welcomed us with open arms. We truly have the utmost love and respect for this couple who now holds a special place in our hearts that we didn’t even know existed prior to this experience.
Out of their grief came our joy, and we will never forget the magnitude and emotional depth of this circumstance.
We would end up spending the next week with Bryce in the NICU as we learned to hold and bond with our baby as he was hooked up to all the monitors. He was a little fighter though and was discharged exactly one week after he was born. We then got to experience life with a newborn in a hotel room for a week as we waited for ICPC clearances. It was the best feeling the day we got the word we could finally go home. We packed up our hotel room in record time!
In looking back at our adoption experience, we are absolutely amazed at how God orchestrated our story. While we were hitting rough patches and times where our faith was being tested, he was still faithfully putting all the pieces into place. Adoption is like a puzzle, and it’s easy to forget that we aren’t the ones who need to put the puzzle together. God has that part taken care of. He hasn’t lost any of the pieces, and he knows how it all fits together. Trust in him and his timing – he will be with you in the wait.
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