“Sounds like you’re having a bad day.” Gayle Brady commented to the waitress, “Julie,” who served her and her husband dinner at a diner in Michigan (some names have been changed for privacy). Knowing Jim and Gayle is to know that they are very kind and loving people. So, it was not unusual for them to ask how this waitress was doing or notice that she was under immense stress. I (Kristen) had gotten to know Jim and Gayle quite well when they would come to North Carolina for the winters, and I was nannying their grandchildren. So, they had already been following our adoption journey and knew we weren’t having much luck.
“Sounds like you’re having a bad day.” Gayle Brady commented to the waitress, “Julie,” who served her and her husband dinner at a diner in Michigan. Knowing Jim and Gayle is to know that they are very kind and loving people. So, it was not unusual for them to ask how this waitress was doing or notice that she was under immense stress. I (Kristen) had gotten to know Jim and Gayle quite well when they would come to North Carolina for the winters, and I was nannying their grandchildren. So, they had already been following our adoption journey and knew we weren’t having much luck.
Julie went on to share with Gayle that she had a lot going on in her life lately; she was concerned because she recently found out her 21-year-old daughter was pregnant with twins who were due in November, and her plan was to safe-surrender the babies at the hospital after the birth. She feared the babies would end up in foster care or be split up and also shared that her daughter already had a 2-year-old she was working hard to support. Gayle mentioned that she had friends in North Carolina (us) hoping to adopt and asked Julie if her daughter had ever considered adoption. Julie was unsure if her daughter had thought of that but became very hopeful about the possibility. So, Gayle and Julie exchanged numbers.
The next day, Jim and Gayle shared this information with their son and daughter-in-law, Chris and Terri Brady, our close friends, and asked if they should share it with us. They both answered with a resounding YES. Later that night, Terri reached out to me about the possibility but encouraged me to be cautiously optimistic as there was so little information and details known at this point.
I was SO excited; however, we had already been so discouraged by the adoption process up to that point that I was afraid to get my hopes up. I reached out to Gayle the next day and asked for Julie’s phone number to contact her. When we reached out, Gayle shared a similar message of being cautious because this seemed to be a long shot and may not go anywhere. However, after much thought and discussion, she decided to step out on faith and pass along her phone number. She went on to share that she knew nothing about Julie except what she had shared at the restaurant that day but that she really liked her and felt for her and her situation.
The next day Tad and I called Julie to see if we could connect with her. She didn’t answer, so we left a message but never received a response. I then texted her the following day to see if that would generate a response. Nothing. Tad called another time that same week, but it went straight to voicemail. A couple of days passed, and we were beginning to think it wasn’t meant to be. Then, on Sunday, August 28th, we were leaving church and ran into Chris while walking out. He had asked if we had connected with Julie yet, and we told him that we couldn’t get ahold of her but would try one last time that day, and if she didn’t answer, we were going to “close the door.” As we were leaving the church parking lot on our way to the pharmacy, Tad tried calling for the last time, and SHE ANSWERED! We were both in shock and so nervous, but the conversation seemed to flow so naturally.
We talked to Julie for around 30 minutes, and she told us all about her daughter, “Kayla,” and we also shared about ourselves and our adoption journey. It was a great conversation, and we felt like we had really connected with her. We then texted her some pictures of ourselves so that she could share them with her daughter.
Side note: After later meeting Julie, Kayla, and Kayla’s dad, “Mark,” in Michigan, we learned that Julie doesn’t answer her phone for people she doesn’t know, which is why she never responded to our calls. However, that Sunday, Mark happened to be at Julie’s house and told her to pick up the phone! Had Mark not been there at that moment, she would not have answered… It’s just another part of the story that we find so amazing, and God aligned all of it.
Julie said she wasn’t sure if her daughter would go for it, but she would talk to her on Monday, show her our pictures, let her read our messages, and let us know what she says.
On Monday night, we received a message from Julie that she had let Kayla read our text messages and convinced Kayla that this would be a wonderful opportunity for us and the babies, and she felt good knowing the babies would be going to a good home. She wanted Julie to attend her ultrasound the next morning with her so she could talk to the nurses about how adoption worked.
We had already made calls to two attorneys in Michigan (one for us and one for Kayla) just to be sure we had accurate information for Julie and to be ready with the next steps if Kayla was on board– since it was private and not through an agency. We confirmed that there wouldn’t be a lot involved for Kayla, which was important to her.
On Tuesday morning, August 30th Julie sent a text: “So I must say congratulations to the new parents of twin babies! Any names picked out?”
To say that was an emotional moment would be an understatement! It was almost like a dream! Tad had been traveling for work that week, so we were trying to navigate all of this from different states. We immediately hired an attorney for Kayla, and within two days, she met with the attorney and created an adoption plan. The birth father also showed up to that appointment and signed his consent for the adoption. We couldn’t believe how quickly and smoothly things seemed to be falling into place.
One of the most beautiful parts of this story is the connection we’ve developed with the birth mother and her family. Initially, Kayla wanted no contact with us, but it wasn’t long after she had created the adoption plan that we had been communicating regularly. Because this was a high-risk pregnancy (being twins and Emma had a 2-vessel umbilical cord), Kayla was going for ultrasounds twice a week and being monitored very closely. I remember the first time she sent me pictures of the ultrasound. It was such a surreal moment. It’s rare in any adoption to have contact with the birth mother before the babies are born, especially if you didn’t know her prior. So, it was extra special to be able to bond in this way. Kayla then started inviting us to join the ultrasounds via FaceTime. It didn’t always work out depending on the nurse that was working since they have strict rules about video and pictures. But her willingness to involve us for each appointment and continually provide updates was so amazing and brought us so much peace! When we met her in Michigan for her last ultrasound on Monday before the birth, she let me join her in person, saved all the printed ultrasound pictures from the time she found out, and gave them to me.
Kayla and I had been in close communication for most of September and into early October, texting almost daily. She would send me pictures of her belly and videos of the babies moving around. She made me feel so involved in the pregnancy, which helped Tad and I bond with her and the babies so much! Outside of the adoption itself, it was one of the most special and selfless things anyone could do for another person.
The more Kayla and I continued to connect, the more comfortable she was with me. At one point, she told me she wanted me to be in the delivery room and cut the umbilical cords! We later found out that wouldn’t happen because she would be delivering in an operating room where she could only have one support person (her mom), but even the thought of her offering meant so much to me.
Kayla was having some difficulty around 31 weeks (September 25th) and had ended up in the hospital on three occasions and being admitted for a couple of days. At that point, every day seemed like a possible delivery day. That’s when I started packing my bags so we would be ready at a moment’s notice. As the weeks began to wind down and the ultrasounds showed that the babies were not growing much, the doctor decided that he would induce her around 34 weeks.
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