Thursday, October 1, 2015

adoption story: alex and amy

There are some stories that are hard to put into words. All of the heartache, all of the waiting, all of the beauty, all of the love... How do you sum it all up or even attempt to write it out? This will by my poor attempt to capture just a few of the dozens of miracles God did in creating their family of three...


I met Alex and Amy over coffee last summer. Amy had worked with my husband and they were just starting to think that adoption might be the route to take to grow their family after struggling with the heartache of infertility. I immediately fell in love with their big hearts and noted their intense desire to follow God's leading for their family.

Later that fall I was thrilled they started with Christian Adoption Consultants and I had a chance to walk with them through their journey. And it was full. They started by moving out of state, selling a home and buying a new home. Beginning new jobs and working to get through their home study. While they were busy with that I worked on creating their profile. In fact, the months consumed with just trying to get through the home study with all of the changes and paperwork was challenging. Roadblocks and barriers kept coming up but Alex and Amy were determined. When their dining room table was full of stacks of paperwork to complete, we talked about how it would be worth it and the timing would someday make sense.

By the end of May their home study was finally complete and I sent Alex and Amy a few situations. They were eager to begin to have their profile presented to expectant mothers, but they were still in the midst of making sure their finances were in order. Just five days after being home study approved, they heard about a young woman they felt an immediate connection to. They heard about her life and her desire to have an open adoption. But their hearts fell when the timing didn't seem to match what they were prepared for; they had just four days to make sure all was in order. 

I love how Amy tells the story of the next few days...

As I began to read it my heart began to beat quickly. My nerves were on high alert. I knew. I knew this was a situation worth presenting to. I immediately called my husband and he too had the same exact feeling. We couldn't really pinpoint why our hearts had such a desire to present to this situation. There were many things that stood out that made us feel a connection. Yet, the feeling was so much more than a connection to the words on this email. 

It was like God was directly saying to both of us "Go for this one!"

Unfortunately though, the cost was more than we had available...and the money was due upon matching and signing a contract. We knew that it wasn't fair for us to present if we didn't have the funds in hand. If we had been picked by this woman, we would hate to have to say "no." We couldn't do that to her. We couldn't do that to ourselves. So, we put sending our home study and profile to the agency on hold. We spoke to our consultant and asked for prayer in these next few days. 

We had 4 days to make a decision. We had 4 days to come up with the funds that weren't fully there for us. 

It would be impossible.

Surely, we misunderstood God's message to our hearts. Surely, we weren't meant to present to this woman because we didn't have our funds ready. Surely, this child was meant for a different family. 

While our logical side told us that it was impossible; the rest of the weekend our hearts continued to tell us it was still worth trying for.

Monday came and we made some phone calls. We applied for an adoption loan, gathered all of our documents and we waited. Convincing ourselves that there was no way this was going to get approved. I had just quit my job as a social worker so that I could stay home with our child when the time came. I had just started watching two little kiddos for this family and so I didn't have many pay stubs. Also, this was so very last minute that there was no way that we could get an approval by the time we needed. it. 

Monday afternoon we received a call telling us "I'm sorry, we just don't have enough documentation to approve this loan. Maybe if you try sending these documents instead." So, our worried hearts did just that. 

Monday evening we received another call. This time, to hear the words "I'm sorry, we just can't approve this loan for you guys right now on your own until Amy has been working for the family for a longer period of time. We know you guys can afford the payments. We just can't make it work at this time." Our hearts sank. We had lost out yet again. And, only because of money. 

Tuesday afternoon came...Our phones rang and it was our lender. She said, "Find someone to co-sign for you. Then, we will approve it and you can present to this mother." Suddenly, our hearts were filled with hope again and we could feel God moving these mountains for us. 

We got our co-signer. We heard that we were approved

We submitted our home study, payments were wired and our profile was sent just a few hours before the deadline that it was all due. (Actually, Susan was worried we may have missed it even!)

The next day we got a phone call that they had received our things and would be taking them to the mother that day and that we would hear back within a week or so. 

We knew this wait would feel like a lifetime. 

Less than 24 hours later; at 8:00am on a Thursday morning we received the call

We heard the words "She chose you."

God had worked in our hearts when we read her story. God had moved mountains when we fell short financially. God had worked in this expectant mothers heart. God brought us all together, and we know its for such a specific reason. 

God's timing is amazing. The way God works is amazing. He may give us a scare now and then but if we continue to trust in Him and let Him continue to guide us along the path to our son we know that it will all be perfect. 

I will never tire of remembering those days leading up to our "yes." I will never tire of telling this story. I will never forget the intricate details that had to be knitted together to bring us to this mother and this baby. 

So, if you're in 'the wait' remember to stay hopeful and remember that God is writing your story too. All of the intricate details are being worked out in His perfect timing. 

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Looking back - this is just one of the ways I've stood with Alex and Amy in awe of God. His perfect timing. His beautiful sovereignty. And his crazy provision. 


This was just the beginning of the story that unfolded in beautiful and miraculous ways over the next few months. Check this post for more on their sweet son's arrival and the relationship they have with his birthmother, Mason. You'll even get a chance to hear directly from Mason about her journey and her thoughts on adoption.

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