My [Im]perfect Life

I was out with some girlfriends recently. Dear friends who not only share my career but also my faith. We met through a local adoption council that meets monthly here in KC and after several lunches at Chipotle and sitting through some horribly boring conferences, we hit it off. Now we meet for coffee or dessert. And most recently we've been crafting together (which is hilarious since none of us are really very crafty at all). It started when one of them got married in a barn and had gobs of leftover burlap.  So we had "Breakfast and Burlap." We've started something...

The dear Nikki and Heather

But back to it. As we were crafting, we were chatting it up and I was sharing the update on my life. They were shocked that it wasn't going well. And I was shocked that they were shocked. These two women have walked pretty closely with me through life this past year and LOTS has happened that has't been sunshine and unicorns.They explained that they were shocked because keeping up in between our craftiness, they follow me on social media. And here's where it gets wonky; they said through my blog and Facebook and Instagram it looks like I have it all together.

What?!  I've been pretty honest here (about my failures at cooking and losing my job to name a few). I recently Instagramed a pic of how the gospel is kicking my rear (see James 1:2-4). And last week Jamy and I decided to start sharing our story which was HUGE to say the least.  

[Insert rear-kicking]

But I've found the same thing with my friends. I think there's mostly two extremes on social media. You either have those that lead extremely dramatic lives and love to live out the drama a little too publicly. Their Facebook page reads like bad country song or a really personal diary entry from seventh grade. Or (the more popular) Twitter feeds of amazing pictures of amazing kids from an amazing husband on your amazing vacation of your amazing life. Only the most fabulous and perfect are blogged and tweeted.

We owe it to each other to be honest. To leave the charade that we have it all together behind and start being real for a change. Because the reality is that we all go through stuff. Hard marriages, lost friendships, cancer, betrayal, bankruptcy, job loss, depression, and on and on. In general, we don't talk about it enough. And if we don't talk about it, we can't talk about our faithful God and walk beside each other in true community. We end up missing real friendship with others when we put on airs of having it all together.

The truth is, no one has it all together. If we did, we wouldn't need Jesus. Which is the lie that we sometimes buy into. If only I had a marriage like theirs...if we could afford that cruise...if my kids behaved that way...if I could fit into those jeans... But then what? When you can fit into the size 4 bikini and look hot on the cruise ship deck, have you nailed it? 

Our hearts were made for more. While we worship created things, our Creator wants us to look to Him. It's only when we face the reality that we don't have it all together and never will that we can rest in what Jesus has done, stop striving, and (here's the kicker) stop making ourselves look better than we really are.  

I'm willing to say that sometimes my life is pretty jacked up...if it means it can spark real conversations about real life and a real Savior who's coming to redeem this messed up, grace-filled journey I'm on.